Alive, sans kickin'

Yeah, I'm still around. After losing what turned out to be TWINS, to my second ectopic rupture, I didn't feel much like posting anymore. I've now lost both of my fallopian tubes, and cannot get pregnant. Tragic, for sure. Currently, I'm waiting for yet another surgery, to take care of a scar tissue adhesion that is causing me pain, and a cyst on my ovary. Surgery is scheduled for August. Ugh.

I'm also having some problems with anxiety. My husband is going away to interrogator school on Feb 5, and will be gone for 5 months. Everyone keeps saying, "Oh, that's far away, you still have plenty of time..." yadda yadda. When you live the life we do, moving every 2-3 years, your concept of time changes. 6 months is a HUGE chunk of time. We're moving to Ft. Polk, LA, next July. Yes, it's a year away, but it feels like tomorrow. I'm not sleeping well, because I'm having disturbing dreams about moving by myself, custody issues, and struggling with the idea of being separated from my honey for half a year, only to be separated for a year and a half. Ft. Polk is where interrogators go to be prepared for deployment *sigh*

This summer has gone pretty well, so far, though. The kids have been pretty good, although my 9yr old son has entered the "I cannot tell the truth" phase. It's hard not being able to trust anything he says. I suppose, just like sleepless nights with a newborn, that this is all preparing me for the teenage years ;)

I have been crafting, mostly crochet. AND, I've been knitting! Much thanks to my wonderful mother<, who taught me more from two states away than all the knitting books I've read ;)

So, here are some pictures, just a sampling of some of the things I've been doing. I'm still doing swaps, a handful at a time, and I've really been enjoying sewing a lot more lately =]


Cherry stamp, carved for the "I <3 Cherries" swap on Swapbot


Little crochet mushroom, with hand-beaded straight pins.


Crochet coinpurse, with zipper, and little crocheted cherries (also for the "I <3 Cherries" swap on Swapbot)


Crochet beret, made from a pattern picked p at my LYS. I *love* this thing, and wear it all the time =]


My first finished knitted project, a sock for my iPhone. I really love this, it works better than any other iPhone "case" that I've had!


Wedding cake toppers (prototype). A good friend is getting married next spring, and asked me to make these for her.


Wire-wrapped jewelry sets, made for teacher gifts. (black is Swarovski crystal, blue is faceted sodalite)


Knitted fingerless loves. Again, I totally love these, and wear them a LOT, usually with the crocheted beret above.


Crocheting a super soft, fuzzy, scalloped scarf.

There you have it. I have been busy, despite pain that won't go away, and anxiety that has me jumpin' at the wind. I will make an effort to blog a whole lot more, although I must warn that my pictures may get crappier, as I have been seduced by the convienience of taking them with my iPhone, and uploading them immediately ;) I also tweet frequently over on Twitter!

Lucky Number 7!

Every birthday my kids have is so special to me. I lost so many babies before they came along, and I hope that one day they will realize how special they are to me, and how encouraging they are to me. Every day that I see them running and jumping, singing, doing their homework, complaining about a bully at school, or quivering that lower lip because they are SO SAD because they wouldn't stop jumping on the sofa and got grounded, or tying 13 ribbons around the cat's tail and beg to re-name it "Pretty Princess"...every day I see these things, and I am reminded that I created the best that the world has to offer, and that I can do it again!

My Ashley is 7 years old today. At 10:20am March 18, 2002, my awesome dr yanked that little girl from my abdomen while her father and I - and the entire staff in the operating room - were singing along to the radio: "Hotel California". Funny, I had never liked that song before. She had a platinum cord, with a TRUE knot in it, and it was also wrapped around her neck. She was in a breech position, with one foot presenting (my cervix dealt with that for 2 months!), her other foot up next to her ear, squished between my ribs. Through all of this, she came out perfect, 7lbs, 13oz, with cheeks so chubby, the drs actually measured her jaw to find out why her chin looked so "pushed in" lol!

Ashley's favorite things to do now are singing (she is very good at making up songs), any kind of art, and playing "school teacher" to her [literally] hundreds of stuffed animals. And, of course, every one of those hundreds of animals sleep with her on her bed (E.T. style ;). Every night, she whispers a prayer over my belly that this baby will come out to meet her. I think she must be the sweetest thing ever ^_^

So, happy birthday Ashley! Thank you for all that you have done for me <3

Houston, we have a problem

So, the part that is needed to fix my computer has been on order from Apple for 2 weeks now. I called today to check it out, and it turns out, the ONLY place to get that part is from Apple's Houston plant.

For those of you that are not in the States, or have been living under a rock, Houston, TX is under water, following a larger-than-Katrina hurricaine.

It could be another 2-6 weeks before they are able to get my part out to me.

Anyone have a 17" PowerBook G4 that doesn't need it's DC port anymore? *cries*

Chicken soup, please

I haven't fallen off the Earth just yet. I'm very ill =[ I've been in bed since Friday morning; wretched painful cough, sore throat, fever, headache, body aches, & minor sinus goop. You know, all the FUN back-to-school stuff *blech*. I'm pretty miserable, but the worst part is that I feel so guilty! I feel terrible that I'm sick in bed, and my kids are bored, stuck in the house. Poor things. I've managed not to pass this plague onto the little ones, but my dear husband, who had been taking such great care of me last week, ended up sick in bed with me all weekend. His immune system tends to be a lot tougher than mine, though, and he is back at work today.

I'm going to try to sit in teh living room this afternoon, so that I can at least be near the kids. Double-edged sword, imo. I can be closer to them, so that they don't feel so alone, and maybe I won't feel so guilty, but then...being closer to them increases the chance that they catch whatever I have.

*sigh*

In happier news, my good friend, Lyndsay, had her baby, Tristan Hawk, this weekend =] I had planned to go down to SoCal to be with her for a little while while she was recovering, but I don't think it's a good idea now. Gold, frankincense, myrr, & a respiratory infection? Nah, probably not a great idea.

I'll Turn This Car Around!

I have some issues with this new hands-free cellphone law. For those of you that are unaware, a law stating that motorists must use a hands-free device to talk on a cellphone went into effect today. Other states that have imposed the hands-free law are: New York, New Jersey, Washington, & Connecticut.

This law is supposed to cut down on accidents caused by people being distracted by the phone.

My issues:
This doesn't mean that people won't be talking on the phone. It only means they will not have a phone in their hand while they are doing it. It is not illegal to drive while smoking, drinking a soda, eating a taco, or applying lipstick. All of these things involve holding something in one hand.

It is not illegal to drive with screaming children in the backseat. Okay, yeah, I know, they can't outlaw the transportation of children (dammit), but you'd be hard-pressed to find a parent that didn't agree that having screaming fighting children in your backseat is immensely distracting. especially when you start waving your hand behind you, trying to reach the fallen toy, the spilled crackers, or the screaming mouths ;)

It is not illegal to text message while driving! Join me now in a collective, "WTF?!" Alaska, Minnesota, New Jersey, and Washington have outlawed text messaging by drivers. How is talking to someone MORE dangerous than typing on a keypad to them, and/or reading? There's a reason cars come with Map Lights. It's dangerous to drive while reading. It can be somewhat dangerous to drive while unable to hear over a sound, but I assure you, my cell is no louder than my stereo, and my stereo falls well within legal limits on noise.

There are actually police that are admitting that this new law is a good thing because it gives them one more reason to stop a car. Did I miss something? I thought we were trying to make the state a safer place to pollute commute?

You can read more surprising crap here: L.A. Times article

Spring me right 'round, baby

It's official...Spring is here in my little pocket of the world ^_^

That's one of the lil' plum trees in front of my home. This was taken a week ago, and now, the two trees look like they've been covered in pink popcorn, they are so full of blossoms! It's been raining consistently the past couple days, but it looks like the flowers are hanging in there =]

I'm definitely ready for Spring:


I love the little posey stamp (the one slathered in bronze ink, hehe) ^.^

I am deathly ill with the flu right now =[ I can barely read, because my eyes start burning almost immediately (is that from fatigue, or fever, or what? My eyes always bother me when I have the flu). I can barely walk, because I'm so dizzy and tired, and I'm so hungry, but it seems the only thing I can get down is chicken broth. Lucky for me, I love chicken broth (with a lil' fresh green onions....mmmm.....). Charlie brought me some Theraflu this morning (one of the few cold meds I can take), and I vomited quite promptly after sipping it. Wouldn't you know, they've changed their formula to make it "better tasting"; this means that aspartame is now the first ingredient on the list. Blech. I can NOT stomach artificial sweeteners.I tried to covered it up with some fresh honey, and fresh lemons harvested from my father-in-law's tree, but nothing can cover up that sickening Sweet n' Low taste >_<

I'm thinking of dropping off Swap-bot for a while. I have so much fun with the swaps, and I have learned a lot of new things there, but I've fallen behind on a handful of swaps already. I know most people there are understanding that sometimes life happens, but it seems to happen to me too much [imo], considering my post office closes earlier than most, and I'm frequently (and without warning) being called into work...and now I'm sick. There have been a couple times that I was a day late sending my swaps because my dear hubby had either taken the car to work, or taken the debit card to work (wouldn't be a problem, if he was actually ever in his office, and I could go pick it up). I have one swap now, which I actually only sent a couple days late, and my partner has informed me hasn't arrived yet. So, I had been working my butt off trying to get together the swaps I need to send out this week, as well as a replacement package for her - insert freaking-out-exhusband requiring an un-planned trip an hour north to pick up my kids, an injured co-worker, needing me to open the bar for a couple hours so that she can see the doctor, scrambling to find a sitter, since I had to pick up the kids almost an entire day early, and then the flu, bringing it's mighty hammer of injustice down upon our household.....*sigh.....I'm not even sure where I am at anymore. Needless to say, I will likely be sending several replacement packages to this woman, for her patience!

Idk, maybe I should learn how to say, "No." But, then, would I have said no to my kids? Or to my job, when it really was an unavoidable emergency?

I should have shouted, "NO!" to the flu, methinks -_-

10 Things I Don't Have to Hate About You Anymore

What a sad, sad day.

Heath Ledger was found dead this afternoon.

*sniffle*